From Cradle to Grave:YouTubeKids is producing modern eunuchs
By Majestic.
For several years now, the overlords have been cultivating a digital pipeline that funnels in children and unsuspecting parents. You may not know of its existence if you don’t have children, but there are clear signs of it outside the digital world. The next time you go to a restaurant and see parents with young children, there is a chance a parent will pull out their iPod Phone or iPod Tablet and prop it up in front of their infant. Is the kid watching some old-school show that the dad torrented and put on his mobile device? You wish. That kid is more than likely watching YouTube Kids.
Now, what kind of intellectually stimulating content can we find on such a platform? There are two chief categories of content, uncanny computer generated “educational videos” and “streamer” content. The former consists of poorly animated and often unshaded CGI characters and props dancing in a barren space with lots of colors, sound effects, the occasional flash of text, and text-to-speech audio describing colors, numbers, or animals. The latter is a bit more complex, in that it is a terse emulation of the already unintelligible world of YouTube and Twitch streamers.
The “educational videos” are the lowest-effort content farm videos you will ever see, and with millions of views per video, one really begins to wonder what the next generation of Western children will sound like after having been raised by text-to-speech software that has the vocal nuance of a UFC fighter singing opera at gun-point. Anyone with Source Filmmaker installed on their computer has a decent chance of making something more aesthetically appealing in under an hour, but if you would go to those lengths to make a video for your children, you’re probably the type of person that could just teach them face-to-face. Can you imagine actually interacting with your offspring instead of passing that responsibility on to some globohomo corporation?
Far worse than that garbage are the “streamer” videos on YouTube Kids. These are likely directed at slightly older children, provided they are still considered too young to use YouTube proper. Maybe they’re so popular because their viewers get to act like “big kids” and watch some effete weakling give mundane commentary from a little rectangle in the corner of their screen while soulless content pours forth into their eyes like a swelling ocean of hot piss. There are some key points about these janky “lets-play” videos to discuss before we move onto the big idea behind this little exposé. First of all, the content farm actors that are paid to make these videos never cease their effeminate wailing. Every video has one - or sometimes two - of these twinks with brightly-dyed pink or blue hair shrieking at the images that flash on the screen, programming the infantile viewers to be constantly hyped-up and overreact to everything with vitriolic levels of feminine intensity. If you meet young kids that watch this type of content, you’ll see what I mean. Secondly, the “games” they are streaming are utter nonsense. Often it’s just Minecraft with some bizarre added assets, and other times it’s some “indie survival-horror” with wacky colorful characters that I’m sure are monetized elsewhere to drain the wallets of sucker parents. Beyond just a way to make a quick buck, these videos are social programming, indoctrinating young boys and girls to create a new super-race of hyperspastic consumoids.
But all that is just the beginning. Sure, your kids might talk funny or act funny if this caustic nonsense enters their heads, but in reality they are being trained to do something you may not have even suspected yet. The children that watch YouTube Kids are being trained to watch YouTube as their primary hobby. It is their therapy, their stress-reliever, their humor, their education, and perhaps even the backbone of the collective child social fabric in communities where many parents allow it. If it’s sanctioned by mom and dad, why would they venture to watch cartoons, read a book, play a game (instead of watching one), go outside, or anything else. Let’s look at the next-worse alternative that we all grew up with: watching cartoons. I won’t give a specific example because all cartoons I’ve ever seen have the following features as consistent parts of the show: characters, settings, themes, plots, and usually moral lessons. We take these things for granted, as although they may seem rudimentary to us, they are not present at all in the content that children consume today. There are no recurring characters or settings when you watch a gaudy femboy play gmod in a room with LED rope-lights. The sorry social skills of today’s zoomers will miraculously dwarf the interpersonal nothingness of the next generation that was raised in a vacuum devoid of storytelling and soul.
And after that, it gets even worse. Once these lobotomized proto-troons are at the corpo-approved age to use the full version of YouTube, they will be inextricably drawn to it. Once a child has an iPod phone of their own, they will shed the trappings of the old website and embrace a nearly identical virtual life. They will only know the fleeting world of a loud-mouthed crowd-pleaser projected into the corner of a cheaply-made Chinese survival-horror game. Alongside that, they will be subjected to the rest of YouTube, including John Oliver videos published a half-second ago bumped to the front page, climate-change alarmism, “Top 10 Best X” videos, leftist political content, and more. The age of Molyneux and Jones is long gone. Beware! In this culture war, your discord memes and twitter shitposting are nothing compared to the tidal efforts underway to indoctrinate children. Their worldview will not even acknowledge the presence of your position.
All of this has been in service of one idea. Actions speak louder than words. If you’re reading the Schizophrenic Observer, you already know what you must do.